January 28, 2008, 7:52 pm
Filed under: funny, random, tellyvision | Tags: , , ,

I had a very noice weekend actually. Slept alot yesterday which was lovely. Went to a very fancy 21st of all things on Saturday night. I thought I’d feel ancient, but despite the fact it looked like a Sweet Sixteen (gonna spread my wings…), there was a good bit of an older crowd at it (not including the mammies, daddies and auntie Marys). Drank far too many G and T’s but spent the next afternoon eating off the hangover and watching Summer Heights High. It’s fooking genius.

Here’s a clip if you’re so inclined:

And random cuteness:
girls are evil

An oldie but a goodie
January 10, 2008, 2:18 pm
Filed under: funny | Tags: , , ,

Got this in an email today. It’s ancient but still very very funny

Peter Kay One Liners

1) I saw a fat woman wearing a sweatshirt with ‘Guess’ on it. I said ‘Thyroid problem?’
2) When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realised that The Lord doesn’t work that way, so I stole one and asked him to forgive me.
3) I’ve often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can’t get my wife to go swimming.
4) I was doing some decorating, so I got out my step-ladder. I don’t get on with my real ladder.
5) I went to a restaurant that serves ‘breakfast at any time’. So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance.
6) A cement mixer collided with a prison van on the Kingston Bypass. Motorists are asked to be on the lookout for 16 hardened criminals.
7) Well I was bullied at school, called all kinds of different names. But one day I turned to my bullies and said ‘Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me’, and it worked! >From there on it was sticks and stones all the way.
8 ) My Dad used to say ‘always fight fire with fire’, which is probably why he got thrown out of the fire brigade.
9) S*x is like playing bridge: If you don’t have a good partner, you better have a good hand.
10) I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said ‘Are you going to help?’ I said ‘No, six should be enough.’
11) If we aren’t supposed to eat animals, then why are they made out of meat?
12) I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers.
13) You know that look women get when they want s*x? No, me neither
14) Politicians are wonderful people as long as they stay away from things they don’t understand, such as working for a living.
15) I was the kid next door’s imaginary friend.
16) Right now I’m having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before

Down with this sort of thing
January 8, 2008, 12:47 pm
Filed under: funny, tellyvision | Tags: , , ,
Had a great evening yesterday in a friends where we watched Naked Camera 3, followed by Making Jake and by the funniest programme in the world, Father Ted. Oh my God, I had forgotten how funny that programme is. And funnily enough, it’s co-creator Graham Linehan has a special Arts Lives profile all to himself tonight. The documentary, called Graham Linehan, Laughmaker, is on RTÉ One at the very watchable time of 10.15pm and I cannot wait to see it.Speaking on Ryan Tubridy this morning, Graham said that he wanted to show people the process of making a sitcom which should be very interesting. The laughter isn’t canned as a lot of people presume and the studio audience watch the show in sequence, just like the audience watching at home on the telly. I’m also looking forward to finding out about the man in question himself and how the feck he writes such brilliant comedy.

And in honour of my renewed Father Ted obsession, I’d like to pick out (or to be more precise, copy and paste) a few of my favourite Ted and co. moments:

Ted: Now concentrate this time, Dougal. These (pointing to plastic cows on table) are very small; those (pointing out of the window) are far away…Dougal: Did you ever see that film, Ted, where your man has his head transplanted onto a fly, and the fly’s head was transplanted onto the man?
Ted: Oh, yes… what was it called…?
Dougal “Out Of Africa”, I think.
Mrs Doyle: What would you say to a cup father?
[offers him a cup of tea]

Tom: Father! I’ve killed a man.
Ted: Er, well, we’ll talk about that later, Tom. Right now, I’m going to be on the telly!

Dougal: We’re all going to heaven lads, Waaaaaaaay

And my personal favourite (having been a Dunnes Stores employee in a previous life)