Driving Lesson No. 2

Driving Lesson No. 2

August 27, 2008, 11:20 am
Filed under: learning to drive | Tags: learning to drive

I suck.

I cannot drive.

I will be getting lifts for the rest of my sad little life.

Well, that’s how I felt last night. This morning I feel slightly better after a big glass of red wine and a sleep. (The wine was consumed last night of course and not for breakfast.)

Last night, my lovely instructor Dave (not his real name) decided I was ready to risk my life, his life and the pedestrians and motorists of South Dublin by leaving the estate and taking to the main roads. At first I felt exhilarated and brave – was it really me moving this massive lethal weapon? We sauntered along for a bit, feeling great as I moved steadily up the gears. All was lovely. I felt powerful.

But then – red lights. Biiiig red lights. On a hill. With cars behind me. Looking rather impatient to get to wherever they were going so busily at 8pm on a Tuesday evening. And then – the fear set in. And would not let go. I could feel drivers beady eyes burning ‘LEARNER’ into the back of my head. If looks could kill….

However, with deep breaths and some gentle foot removing from the clutch, I moved off from the lights with only a slight kangaroo hop. And all should have been well. But for some bizzarre reason, the more lights I approached, the more nervous I became. I have no idea why – I was moving the car, I’d ‘only’ cut out three times (twice at the same lights), and Dave hadn’t shouted at me too loudly. Yet.

As we approached the home run, I actually confused green lights for red and began to slow down in a panic. Up to that point, most of the lights I had come up to were red by some annoying coincidence and so in my tired frazzled state, I lost all sense of reason and how to tell one colour from another. Dave kindly informed me of my mistake hence I panicked some more and madly revved the car round the turn in to my estate. After narrowly missing some innocent bystanders, I could breathe, I was back into the estate. And nobody had died, or even been maimed.

We had a quick debriefing, where he told me that I hadn’t done that bad at all really whilst I pretended to smile, all the while praying to the dear Lord above that I wouldn’t cry like a child in front of this poor man. We booked another lesson (I bet he wishes I hadn’t), wished each other a nice evening and I walked back into my house, feeling my legs about to collapse underneath me. I waved at him again as I closed the door and as soon as I felt it shut completely, I began to cry. However, the release was bloody amazing.

My next lesson is a couple of days away and I’m looking forward to it with a mixture of pure unadulterated dread and excited anticipation. It can only get better right? Right?!

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